“Resilience” is not everyone’s cup of tea.
“Patience” is not everyone’s acquired taste.
“Persistence” is not everyone’s ideal.
I never realized life would get tough or rather overwhelming each day you grew older.
Every day is a new Pandora’s box of problems, solving these is a metaphoric accolade but only at the cost of sticking through the problems right? You give up on problems, accolades give up on you.
While I write about Resilience and Patience, in this world of ADHD I contemplate how focused are we in general? Be it a problem, be it a solution, or be it even contemplation. I mean I’ve written 5 lines so far and I am pretty sure that my reading drop rate would have hit a certain no just because I’m not getting to the point.
Ironic, how we were taught the significance of reading only to unlearn and easily blend in this superfluous curriculum of being “Scatterbrained”.
2 months ago, I joined the 5 am club ‘again’. I’ve been a part of it since 2013 but my relationship with this club has been sporadic. Yes, the idea of this club always stuck through and this was the reason why I kept coming back to it. 2 months ago when I returned to my base post my wedding, I had a lot to work on. While my husband was working diligently towards his goals on a different continent my zeal towards improving my life and especially my career was hitting the dust. Before I’d lose it all in a snap I decided to take a stand and turn things around. That’s where my 5 am club came back to me.
When you start planning for something big I mean something bigger than you, the planning no matter how overwhelming the execution gets more formidable. And trust me when I say this “Resilience” is that herculean power that helps you turn this formidable event into a possible one. When I started this routine after years, the first day I could hardly open my eyes but I was quite determined to start my journey and test my benchmark of resilience. 2 months gone, waking up at 5 am is now a natural trait that I’ve developed. Well getting back to my point, when I started this routine I decided to spend this holy hour just for myself where I read, wrote, heard the virtuous, practiced piano, and spent my time with my retriever baby Althea.
So far, I’ve seen changes for sure. Changes which ferment like wine. Not evident each day but definitely evident at certain intervals.
What do you think, where am I going with this next? Patience or Persistence or both? Honestly, let me come back to that in a while.
When I started focusing inward on this plan rather than routine, I started unveiling more answers. What is it that I wanted from myself? The kind of work that would spur my interest? The lifestyle which would keep my ambitions alive and above all the perspective paradigm that would make me a better partner to my husband.
To enunciate further on this let me share a small anecdote that as a child left a huge dent in my mind
“ A child was studying the world map. (Let’s name this child Jarvis just for better elaboration). Jarvis was sharp-minded. He was exploring the world map on paper. To convert this moment into a life lesson his dad stepped in and politely took that paper from him. On the back i.e. the blank side he penned down a complicated equation. He showed that to Jarvis and the next minute tore the paper into 5 pieces. To his surprise, Jarvis got curious and not mad. He further handed these pieces to Jarvis and asked him to assemble the equation just the way it was written. Jarvis obviously was flabbergasted with this request but he didn’t lose his calm. Just like another challenge he took the paper and started working it out. In the next 7–8mins, he approached his dad back with the paper stuck together exactly the way it was before tearing. This time Dad lost his mind. What had started as a life lesson exercise had turned into a fun event as Jarvis was already a step ahead? Now you’d wonder how he did it. It was fairly simple. Right before his dad had walked in he was studying the map and when his dad tore the paper he didn’t take the effort to stitch the complex equation together rather he fixed the map and the equation got automatically fixed in the background”
Interesting right, quite interesting I’d say. So far are you still with me? Wow, I’m happy you’ve crossed the first level of the ADHD test, and kudos the results are negative.
Now this story hit me so much that all this while in my life I’ve focused on fixing the map rather than the complex equation and trust me fixing the map has always stitched my complex equations together. Does that mean, I am a human with no problems anymore, or I’m super sorted? Haha, I wish I were that simple. You know I’ve read smartest people are the most complex. It is funny how I consider myself in that cohort but why not, smartness also lies in the eyes of the beholder. Honestly, I struggle to see it so I correlate it the other way around i.e. I’m so complex that I must be a little smart hahaha. Jokes aside, I am still perplexed, struggling with relentless questions but what’s helping me figure out the answers are these three points mentioned above “ResPatPer” (Pardon my acronym skills)
I even pledge to stick to these principles no matter what because I know for a fact that these will sail my boat in the right direction.
Reader check, you’re still with me, right? Perfect! A small pat on your back :)
To get back to my routine, waking up at 5 am was now smooth as butter for me but my new struggle was to maintain my efficiency. This is where I started reading books. “Road to the Character” by Steven Brooks has been my current read. The interesting anecdotes translating to paramount lessons kept me hooked for hours while I read it. In the process, I acquired quite some knowledge of these values. Another line that struck like a bolt was “Personality is a product of cultivation”. While I read this, I distinctly remember my mind pausing for a minute just to process it. You know I’ve been fortunate to meet people who have challenged my inspiration benchmark each time. To quote a few examples, an industry legend who is also a professor relentlessly teaching kids and helping them grow, a doctor who is constantly upscaling himself just to cure patients better, a leader who is reading and pampering hobbies just to keep the mind active. Their personalities heroically talk about the way they’ve been cultivating it and how you think they’ve been doing it. Or rather, what do you think has been the biggest glue to keep their cultivation process intact is it “ResPatPer” or is it a “natural talent”? If you ask me I’d say 9 cases because of “Resilience, Patience, and Persistence” and 1 case because of talent ResPatPer.
We are all always busy with work, and the toxicity at work is always the cherry on the cake when it comes to triggering or bursting into anger. The gossips and ADHD curriculum is always a distraction but how do you plan to break these thorns standing in your way to something bigger than you?
Yes I’ve been questioning a lot but at the same time I am also showering my insights on what’s helping me focus inward while the world around me is basing moon (metaphor again, since when you compare yourself to anyone their world seems impeccable and trust me it is true for 7/10)
So as I’ve reiterated this fundamental throughout my piece, I conclude this piece by telling myself “ Please be resilient, it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, and hence it’s difficult. It’ll take a lot out of you now but it will yield more than you can expect pretty soon. Please be patient even when it’s not your acquired taste because this taste once acquired will surely take you long. And please be persistent because 3 months down the line when you’d look back you’d see that you’ve reached a new peak and from this view, the world around would look different”
While I’ve concluded things for me, there’s a lot for you if you look closely. And if you have been with me so far and you’ve read this piece till here, then my friend, this time let me pat your back because you’ve been ResPatPer with this piece and you definitely have negated all levels of ADHD reading test.
PS: This reading test, is just my hypothesis and I will soon find a psychotherapist to validate my hypothesis and help me conclude this formally :p so this time, hit that clap not for me but for you!!!
